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ultimate jokes n quotes |
pattiboy02
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Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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suppressemotion
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Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293
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Post: #92  Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 10:50 pm Post subject: |
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| pattiboy02 wrote: | Officer Santa: Madam swimming is restricted in this lake.
Lady: why didnt you tell me when I was removing my clothes?
Officer Santa: That is not restricted ...
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Banta changed all his passwords to 'incorrect' ...
So that whenever he forgets,
the computer will automatically remind him "Your password is incorrect".
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pattiboy02
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Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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| Post: #93 Posted: Fri May 27, 2011 9:21 am Post subject: |
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Q. What will u call a person who is leaving India??
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A. HindustanLever (Leaver).
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Q. What will u call a person who leavesIndia , but doesn't travel much??
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A.Hindustan Lever Ltd (Limited).
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pattiboy02
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Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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| Post: #94 Posted: Fri May 27, 2011 3:05 pm Post subject: |
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Santa tells to Banta, " My Girlfriend took Pregnancy Test Yesterday"
Banta " Kya hua fir ????
Why are you so sad ????
Were the questions in test so difficult ????  
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pattiboy02
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Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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| Post: #95 Posted: Sat May 28, 2011 8:41 am Post subject: |
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Teacher Fill in the blank : 900 chuhe kha ke billi _____ chali.
Santa: 900 Chuhe khake billi tedi medi chali..
Teacher slapped him: 'Oye murkh(silly), tujhe iska jawab nahi pata hai?'
Santa: aapka lihaaz rakha maine,kyonki aap mere teacher ho, warna 900 chuhe khake billi hill bhi nahi sakti maine toh fir bhi tedi medi chala di... 
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pattiboy02
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Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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| Post: #96 Posted: Sat May 28, 2011 8:53 am Post subject: |
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Question : What is the opposite of 'Achaar'…
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No, nooo.. its not Vichaar
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Socho Socho
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Chalo hum batate hain…
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Opposite of Achaar is Onion
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Par Kaisse????
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Aise :: Achaar = Pickle = pee-kal
Opposite of Pee-kal is Pee-aaj = peeaaaj == Onion….Hence proved!!!!
I know what is going in your head now..
Wanna kill me ???????????
It is not me...... I copied it 
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suppressemotion
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Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293
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| Post: #97 Posted: Sat May 28, 2011 9:06 am Post subject: |
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Aaj Ka Vichar :
Kaamyabi " Toilet " ke smell ki tarah hoti hai.............!
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Bardasht tabhi Hoti hai..........Jab apni hoooo ___________lolzz 
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pattiboy02
White Belt
Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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| Post: #98 Posted: Sat May 28, 2011 9:09 am Post subject: |
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| suppressemotion wrote: | Aaj Ka Vichar :
Kaamyabi " Toilet " ke smell ki tarah hoti hai.............!
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Bardasht tabhi Hoti hai..........Jab apni hoooo ___________lolzz |
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suppressemotion
White Belt
Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293
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| Post: #99 Posted: Sat May 28, 2011 11:46 am Post subject: |
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3 FRIENDS going to their room at 100th floor of building!
One day LIFT was not working......!
They start to walk in steps !
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......Ist person told an action story upto 50th floor!
2nd person told a comedy story upto 99 floor!
3rd person told a on sentinment story!
Which brought tears in all there eyes......
what is that.....
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"I FORGOT THE ROOMKEY IN THE CAR"
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adsingh101
White Belt
Joined: 09 Nov 2010
Posts: 242
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| Post: #100 Posted: Sat May 28, 2011 11:54 am Post subject: |
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Purani KAHAWAT:
NEKI KAR DARIYA MEIN DAAL,
NAYI KAHAWAT:
KUCH BHI KAR FACE BOOK PE DAAL!!!!!!!!! 
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suppressemotion
White Belt
Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293
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| Post: #101 Posted: Sun May 29, 2011 7:55 pm Post subject: |
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A SMS sent by a Man to his wife: `Hi Honey, I am just having my last beer, and I will be home in 30 minutes. If I am not, please read this SMS again!`
FOR ALL BEER LOVERS
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pattiboy02
White Belt
Joined: 16 Mar 2009
Posts: 220
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| Post: #102 Posted: Sun May 29, 2011 8:55 pm Post subject: |
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Caution Signboard at a famous beauty parlor in Bombay:
'Don’t whistle at the girl going out from here.
She may be your grandmother!'
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radheradhe
White Belt
Joined: 01 Jan 2011
Posts: 3
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| Post: #103 Posted: Sun May 29, 2011 9:09 pm Post subject: |
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ek aurat coma me chali gai. Uske ghar wale usse murda samajkar jalane chale.
raaste me aurat ek khambe se takrayi aur aurat ko hosh aa gaya.
1 saal baad wahi aurat sach me mar gayi .
sab log RAM NAAM SATYA HAI. bolte ja rahe thee, lekin
uska pati ki zuban pe ek hi baat thi
KHAMBA BACHA KE
KHAMBA BACHA KE
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suppressemotion
White Belt
Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293
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| Post: #104 Posted: Sun May 29, 2011 10:51 pm Post subject: |
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| pattiboy02 wrote: | Caution Signboard at a famous beauty parlor in Bombay:
'Don’t whistle at the girl going out from here.
She may be your grandmother!'
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suppressemotion
White Belt
Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293
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| Post: #105 Posted: Sun May 29, 2011 10:53 pm Post subject: |
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Don't concentrate on what Someone Else can Do that you Cannot Concentrate on What You can Do That Others Cannot.
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